October - December 2015 •
The Lion King
• 41
Pragmatic ways to parenting |
Productivity
excellent parent from the word go. You
have to proactively work to achieve
your desired target; from planning to
conceive, giving birth, patiently nur-
turing them through the first few days
post delivery, carefully choosing and
preparing their meals for the week,
ensuring they have a healthy and bal-
anced diet, their clothes, toys among
others, to planning your time so as to
spend quality time with your children.
2.
Know and model the desired val-
ues:
Know the exact attributes you
want to see and endeavour to be
what you preach. You want your
children to have integrity, keep your
word always. You want them to be
industrious, teach them the values of
hard and honest work.
3.
Educate yourself:
the cliché that
“knowledge is power” is also true for
parenting. You can make informed
decisions on how to deal with the pos-
sible challenges that may face your
Children only if you know what they
are, in the first instance. Know your
children’s friends. Get familiar with
what they do on the internet- Try to
find out new slangs, sign languages.
Be a youth at heart. You can only
guide your kids on what you know.
And this is true for a number of things.
4.
Be approachable and trustworthy:
The best way to instil values is through
mentoring and instilling the desire to
be responsible in your kids. You can-
not achieve this if they cannot trust
you or do not believe you have their
best interest at heart. Learn to listen to
them and not over react when they
tell you things you may find alarm-
ing; keep their secrets and do not
judge them. Continuous guidance is
the word.
5.
Teach them in the way they should
go:
This goes beyond giving them a set
of rules to follow. It involves painting
scenarios and guiding them on how
to behave if they are presented with
similar issues or circumstance. Talk with
them about the things they see in their
world and give them the freedom to
share their fears and doubts with you.
6.
Pray:
Ask for wisdom to know how
to deal with the dynamics of their
age. Pray for them to discern the
good and the subtle evil lurking in their
world. Pray with them, so they know
you have also learned to depend on
God for guidance and support. More
importantly, teach them to pray and
help them to cultivate a praying habit.
7.
Communication is everything:
Every child sometimes desire to have
or keep a confidant, no matter how
quiet he or she is. They are under
pressure with their riotous emotions;
they seek counsel and understanding
and when that parent figure is not
available they run off to their friends.
Parents must be sensitive to these
yearnings in their Children and must
be fully involved. Talk about sexu-
ality, and their feelings. Talk about
everything and anything with them, it
means a lot. It guarantees you access
into their trust and dependability.
8.
Listen:
It is great to communicate
regularly with your teens; however,
there is need to listen to them too. If
you are lucky to have them want to
confide in you, please give a listening
ear. When you listen more than you
talk, you will be able to advice them
better.
9.
Be real to them:
We live in the 21st
century, where everywhere you look,
there are a million things telling your
child about sex, drugs, violence, crime
etc. This generation thinks differently
than their parents thought when they
were teenagers. So, if you want to
advise teens against any social vice,
make sure you tell the real conse-
quences of that action or inaction,
because they will Google it just after
any discussion. Every action has a
repercussion, whether good or bad;
so speak from that stand point and
not what was obtainable in your time.
10.
Do not be Judgmental:
The fastest
way to lose your teen’s trust is to beat
down every opinion and event around
them. Be very firm, but be open-mind-
ed as well. Before you voice an opin-
ion about anything, please make sure
you understand the scenario very well,
especially on their choice of fashion,
friends, what they watch, and so on.
Note; never accept anything that is
against your belief, values, and peace
of mind. However, do not be overly
opinionated always.
Talk about sexuality,
and their feelings.
Talk about everything
and anything with
them, it means a lot.
It guarantees you
access into their trust
and dependability.”
